Tomorrow, May 3, is my youngest daughter’s birthday. She was born in 1975, when I was 22 years old. While I love my daughter dearly, I wasn’t happy to find out I was pregnant again. My second child was only six months old when I got that news, and I cried for more than three months. Every day. Sobs, not just tears.
On my birthday that year, when Emily was three weeks old, I cried all night long. I remember at the time feeling like all I would ever do was be pregnant and have babies. I had been married less than 4 years and I had three children. I had my tubes tied while I was still in the hospital after she was born, but it was a struggle to get my husband to agree to let me have it done. He wanted me to have one more child, and I had no desire for more. I told him I wouldn’t go home from the hospital with him if I didn’t have it done.
Yes, back in 1975, you had to have your husband’s permission to have a tubal ligation. In 1969, you had to have your husband’s permission to take birth control pills. We as women have come a long long way.
I can remember when I was in elementary school, junior high, and high school, girls were not allowed to wear pants to school. If you got pregnant while you were still in high school, you had to quit school. You were no longer allowed to go to school. You also couldn’t continue to go to high school if you got married before graduation.
When I started working at Southern Bell, in 1970, women were required to wear dresses to work. I remember the day one of my co-workers showed up to work in pant suit, to challenge the dress code set up by the company. All eyes were on her as she was escorted out of the office by two managers. She was sent home without pay because she wore pants to work. One of our co-workers, who was an adult but was not married, got pregnant. She was fired, and told that her health insurance wouldn’t pay for the birth of her child. That was in 1971. If you were married and got pregnant, lots of companies did not have to let you come back to your job.
Once when I was looking for a job in 1977, I was interviewed by a man. I had been looking for work for two years. I started looking when Emily was three months old, and she was well over two years old at the time. Oneof my very good friends had been babysitting for free while I looked for work, because she knew I would start paying her as soon as I started getting a paycheck.
On this particular interview, the guy asked me who was going to take care of my children if they were sick. I asked him “Do you ask men who you interview that question?” He replied “No, because men don’t have the primary responsibility of taking care of their children.” I was qualified in every way for that job, but I didn’t get it because I had children.
When I try to tell my own daughters what it was like being female while I was growing up and as a young adult, they find it hard to believe. I definitely feel that my daughters have a better world than we did back then, but things could still be better for women. If you are older, like me, what were some of the things you faced as a woman over the years that are different now? If you are a younger woman, what changes for women’s rights would you like to see in your lifetime?
I worked at a “no pants” office in 1973 so showed up with a mini skirt so short it skimmed above the bosses desk when I asked him to request a change in the dress code. And it worked, we could wear pant suits.
Although much has changed for women since we were younger I get the feeling we’re going back in time what with all the vagina laws now being brought out.
May our daughters live to see better.
I find it hard to comprehend a time when women were little more then their husband wife. It’s amazing how far we have come. Your family is beautiful.
What fun memories! 🙂
What a beautiful family! And how the times have changed!
Great post! Yesterday I was going back in time on my WW posts with my son. We had a blast laughing at old pictures I have taken of him.
so much fun sharing your life in memories and photos thank u
Wow! Women sure have come a long way! I remember my grandma telling me stories about working as a waitress for 23 cents an hour! I think I would love to see a woman president someday in my lifetime, if the right one came along!
I was a Flight Attendant in the early 80’s and subjected to monthly weigh-ins. We had to wear heels, make up, nail polish. Certain hair clips weren’t allowed as they were deemed too sexy. Crazy. So glad my daughter has more options and freedoms.
Love this post! It’s fun looking back on life.
Kas
This is an important post. Important that we remember where we have been, to better understand where we are going.
I went to high school, jarvis Collegiate in Toronto, Ontario. It was the first year we were allowed to wear pants to school. Yet, we wore miniskirts. What’s with that?!
My friends had to quit teaching when they were pregnant, no maternity leave. So sad.
I laud you, sister.
Wow! I’m glad things have changed for the better. I just wish people would wake up and see that we could easily go back to those times if we are not careful!